Comment on So you grew up with a dad who didn’t know how to express love? Here’s how it could be affecting you today by Em.
My parents divorced when I was 3. But that didn’t change the fact that I was a daddys girl. I followed him everywhere, even after the divorce and I only saw him on the weekends, I was on his heel at all times. But as I got older, my dad started his own life. When I was six my dad met a woman 10 years younger than him. She was in her twenties, had been married, been in rehab, and never did anything with her life, until she met my dad. They weren’t together long before surprise, she got pregnant. This cigarette smoking, pot head got pregnant with my baby brother. I love him. And do not regret them having him. But after he was 3 or 4 years old, they got married. She is pot head still to this day. My dad drinks more and more just to deal with her. She has turned the man I once knew into a piece of shit. She doesn’t much like me, so neither does my dad. I have 4 siblings whom my dad loves. But me, he won’t talk to me. See me. Or anything. He does everything in his power to avoid me. Everything good that I did or do was for my father’s approval. I longed to hear him say that he was proud of me or that he loved me. But not until just recently did I realize that I will never have my dad back. I will never again be or feel like daddy’s little girl and I’ve accepted it. The fact that I know that my father won’t be at my graduation, giving me away at my wedding or even in his grandchildren’s life, hurts me. But he’s made his choice. I’ve given him time to change his mind and it never happened. He has lost me forever and that’s just the way it has to be. Time to move on, right?
